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At what age should you start teaching babies right from wrong?

My baby is 10 months and my friend has a baby the same age. When can babies tell right from wrong. She smacks her babies hand or butt. She doesn't do it hard but I am just curious if the baby even knows what they should or shouldn't be doing and should you start teaching them at 10 months?>?

Public Comments

1. No they do not know but continuously bringing it to their attention they will learn quicker. I would say there is no time to start correcting them. The sooner the better.

2. Honestly, you start teaching them right from wrong at birth just from your baby watching you. There is never a good reason to smack a child, no matter what. They are humans and deserve respect just as anyone else does. There are many effective parenting methods using positive reinforcement that will mean you never need to hit your child. Your friend is mistaken, hopefully she just doesn't know better. 10 months is too early even if you do believe in hitting your kids. At that age, redirection is much more effective.

Scroll down to 'Dicipline & Behavior': http://www.askdrsears.com/

3. You can start doing this from birth just by acting by example. If you do right in your day-to-day activities, your baby will mimic your behaviour and do right as well. If you smack your baby like your friend is doing, this will only teach them to hit back. Next thing you know your baby is hitting their peers (or you!) when they're not happy about something.

I don't think it's a bad idea to teach him right from wrong now, but do it by example. If he's mean to a peer (such as your friend's baby), show him how to be nice and make him give the other baby a hug and you say "now we say 'I'm sorry'". Leading by example is the best way and never to early.

4. I started doing very short "time outs" with my twins when they were around 18 months. By "time out" I mean redirect them, sit them on my lap and hold their hands, tell them "we don't hit" or whatever and then sit there for 30 sec. or so. Then I'd stand them in front of me and say "you need to say you're sorry.... we don't hit because that hurts... and mommy loves you." A 10 month old shouldn't be disciplined.

5. The second you squeeze it out!

6. We just use redirection: moving them away and giving them a "yes" thing. We are not in favor of spanking at all. Both are very well behaved, but we use a lot of redirection, consequences- for our son who understands them, and verbal rewards...it works here.

At 10 months, the drive to get to whatever they want overrides the thought of a spank or the word, "NO", and so they proceed.

There are other ways to discipline- what works for us may not work for another, but our son has autism and we found spanking always caused a meltdown the few times we used it- because we didn't know WHAT ELSE TO DO. Therapy and time taught us what works, and so we are using this on our daughter as well.

She is 17 months now and when we say no, she moves away, unless it REALLY turns her on...and then we redirect, say no firmly and give her a Yes thing. Sometimes she will toss a tantrum, and we lay her down and walk away. It ends quickly.

I have clapped my hands to redirect her attention first. I teach in a rough area of the city- I cannot spank the children in my class and they come in with awful behaviors...and turn it around using similar tactics...and rewards as well as consequences...so, my husband and I made the decision not to use it on our kids and it works.

That is what we use. Good luck!

7. I believe you should teach your baby right from wrong at 10 months old because if you spoil them and act too nice to them at a young age, they'll stay that way. Trust me!!! They won't want to hug you anymore and they'll feel superior to even their own parents so don't go for that one. As soon as they reach a reasonable teen-age, let them make their own decisions so they can learn from their mistakes and become stronger and wiser!

8. I believe they understand NO by this age... Make sure they are paying attention to you when you are trying to repremend them...

9. Some infants understand no starting as early as 6 months. but.. most dont really listen until 12 months.. however some studies suggest they are capable of it at 9-10 months. My daughter CLEARLY understands no at 11 months.

My daughter was taught no at exactly 9 months. This included a swat on the diaper when she did something repeatedly. SHE UNDERSTOOD IT. Now at 11 months if I ever say the word no she wants to start whining, as she walks away to do something else. She clearly understands when mommy or daddy tell her no.

I never once "spanked" her hard enough for her to feel it, just hear it. Now at 11 months I tell her no and she stops doing what she is doing and goes and finds something else to do.

At 9 months she was into EVERYTHING and even though MOST of the time we let her explore there were certain situations that were not safe and just removing her from that situation stopped working around 9-9 1/2 months. That was when we started swatting her on the butt.. now at 11 months I think shes been swatted maybe 10 times total...

Thumbs down me all ya want the proof is sleeping in her crib right now! I guarantee my child will not be the one throwing fits in public and yelling and screaming at me when she is a toddler. Time out works for certain things, and so does a smack on the butt. We made the decision to use this to discipline our daughter after watching a couple documentaries on a child development (when they can understand certain things!) , and discussing it with our pediatrician.

She is ahead of the game in all milestones, walking, talking, eating, weaned from the bottle, etc. she always has been.. there is no difference here. I do believe some babies may not be ready at 10 months but our daughter is clearly ready to understand. She has had the motor skills of a 12 month old since she was 9 months old... she was plenty ready.

10. She's on the right track. They can figure things out early-- esp if they get a tap when they do something and praise when they do something else.

She's better than some moms I've run across. They let their 5 year olds get away with murder!

11. Waiting to introduce discipline later than 10 months could make the task more difficult , but trying to do so before 10 months is pointless because their capability to remember things is still underdeveloped. So 10 months is the perfect time to introduce discipline. In doing this you are teaching your baby the concept of right and wrong and should be doing so by both example and guidance. Your are also teaching them self control. This won't take root for a while, but patience is key. Thirdly you are also teaching to respect the rights and feelings of others. I know this seems like alot for a 10 month old but you are teaching them the base of all this that they will later build on. Hitting is not going to solve anything because you are only teaching the child to hit. A great book is What to Expect the First Year. It explains many loving ways of disciplining your baby and also will have many other answers to the many questions yo may have.